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Touch

2012-02-10T16:34:41Z

"We can never touch just one thing; we always touch two at the same instant, an object and ourselves, and it is in the simultaneous interplay between these two contiguities that the internal sense of self- different from both the collection of body parts and the collections of external objects- is encountered... my tactile surface is not only the interface between my body and the world, it is the interface between my thought processes and my physical existence as well. By rubbing up against the world, I define myself to myself."

Deane Juhan, "Job's Body"

I read this quote from the brilliant bodyworker Deane Juhan in my Restorative Yoga class last night. I am fascinated by Juhan's lucid and poetic description of how we continually define ourselves by what we touch. And- I surmise- since we are always touching something, then we have the opportunity to continue to define ourselves all the time.

Everything that is happening around us is also touching us, affecting us. Every news we hear, every piece of information has the ability to remind ourselves of who we are and what we align with. Each moment we get to connect and reconnect with who we are and with how we want to be.

Yesterday I taught three classes at Still and they all went so well. I feel that with my recent craniosacral learning experience, I have an even greater appreciation for Prana, for the energy within and without that is really our true teacher. More than anything I am a student of Prana! I want to continue to explore and share information with the students that will help them connect to their own wisdom, their own energies and move from that place.

Off to teach. And later deeply honored to take one of my clients, who I have worked with for over 8 years, to Radiation therapy at UCLA. What an honor that she asked me to drive her to radiation. Yoga brought us together and she has given me so much. Now I get to be of service to her during her cancer. Every day I am so deeply grateful to all the ways yoga has changed my life.

Kali Time

2012-02-08T17:23:54Z

Today I feel better.

In the midst of the myriad emotions there is a slight excitement in my blood?

It seems as if its Kali-Time; the goddess of destruction who comes to dissolve what needs to be dissolved and clear the way for the new. This is the time when things are getting stirred up and we are called to dig deep into all that we have learned, stepping forward into the next unknown.

I have no idea what is to come but I am witnessing my community of Anusara yogis stand tall and embody the teachings, in particular The First Principle: pausing, waiting before reacting, listening to the facts, opening to the good that will come eventually out of all of this.

It seems to me as if we who care about Anusara yoga, about John, and the kula, are all doing at the same time the most challenging pose. We are moving slowly, step by step, principle by principle, breath, skin, fascia, muscle, bone, fear, doubt, silence, conversation, wait, try again, listen. Some are exiting the room, some are already onto another pose, but most of us are trying to be in the moment, as the moment becomes revealed to us. And yes even as John is investigated for what he is allegedly accused of, he taught us well. He-as well as the many other gifted teachers we have had- have taught us well.

We know what to do.

We have been trained well.

I take this moment to thank the teachings of yoga and to thank all of my teachers -including John, who is my main asana teacher and who I hold in the highest esteem without putting him on a pedestal.

Off to move into my day, which includes teaching my beloved Anusara yoga.

a sadness

2012-02-07T23:02:04Z

I have been feeling sad the last few days. There are some disturbances in the field of yoga that I teach and practice. Some rumbles creating a perfect storm, churning the oceans of the community. It feels like poison right now and maybe it will become nectar over time. But for now I hold the little information I have in my throat and wait before I can spit or digest it.

Just for today, I go back to where it all started for me: at my yoga mat. At my body and breath in communion.
Yoga is bigger than a teacher, it is bigger than a style.
It's the teachings and not the teacher.
It's the energy and how it pulsates. The ebb and the slow flow.

I take a deep breath.
I am about to teach my second class today. I look forward to teaching as well as to practicing.
I am so grateful for yoga; and yes, grateful for all my teachers.
I find a poem before I go, and re-read it... And all shall be well...

I know a cure for sadness:

Let your hands touch something that

makes your eyes

smile.

I bet there are a hundred objects close by

that can do that.

Look at

beauty's gift to us-

her power is so great she enlivens

the earth, the sky, our

soul.

Mirabai, India

Craniosacral listening

2012-02-06T17:14:53Z

I took part for the last three days in a Craniosacral Unwinding level 1, through the IPSB school. We met at the most beautiful setting of Temescal canyon from 9:30 to 6:30, Friday, Saturday and Sunday. There was so much to sharing and exploration. I will write about one instance:

I was being used as a demo for different kinds of palpation on the head. Everyone was gathered around me as the teacher -the phenomenal Gary Strauss- was holding my head. He was talking about how some people like to have their head lifted a bit, while others don't. He said that generally people with a flat-neck do not like their head lifted. He gently lifted my head a bit and asked how it felt. I heard myself say, "No." Which completely surprised me since I am such a people-pleaser. He immediately brought my head back down and gently cradled it. As soon as he did that I felt my body become calm and felt a release of energy traveling down my spine, all the way towards my sacrum. As he continued to hold my head with the lightest touch, I felt my body shaking, as if my nervous system was releasing stress. Gary -who doesn't know me- spoke about my process. He felt my body had been through trauma and that my nervous system was processing it. I felt myself crying softly and continuing to go into a deep place inside of listening; kind of like it feels when I meditate. A way to describe it is as if you are on a journey. It's not sleep- it's like you are traveling inside. I felt so calm and yet like healing was happening. Afterwards as I walked around for the rest of the day feling so grounded and alive.

Craniosacral is about listening deeply to the cranial wave and to the profound stillness and wisdom that lies inside. As we worked on one another I found that I could also experience that same stillness and journeying quality, when I was working on someone. The more relaxed I was as a practitioner, the more the client relaxed. The whole process is about listening to the intelligence of life and letting it move in its healing way.

I look forward to continue to practice this with my friends and to continue to explore listening intently to others and to life itself. I look forward to continuing to listen to the deepest wisdom which guides us onwards as we navigate the ups and downs of day-to-day life. To that deep wisdom that nudges us to go or stay, to wait or act, to pause or move. To be or become.

Staying open to possibilities

2012-02-02T20:00:52Z

On Monday I saw a really fun action movie called "Haywire." It stars a mixed-martial arts champion named Gina Carano. Generally in movies I am not as invested in action sequences. But here watching Gina fight off gorgeous men (Channing Tatum, Michael Fassbender and Ewan McGregor) in such a creative and strong way was thrilling and empowering. I left the Arclight theatre karate-chopping my legs down the stairs and wanting to study Krav Maga. I left with a deep appreciation for all that the human body can do, all that it is capable of. Go Gina Carano!

And on a more down to earth level, it got me thinking how we come to yoga class -us mortals-and we end up doing poses that we didn't think we could do! This happens all the time. I get to witness and be a participant in this phenomena every day! Just last week I did a pose (Ganda Bherundasana) that I literally wrote off as a pose "that will never happen for me; ever." That pose was in my "To never do" list. You know how often we do that? How often we decide that we cannot do something and we simply stop trying? Just on Tuesday a student came in telling me that she was "really weak" and that she cannot do cobra. By the end of class- you guessed it- she did several beautiful cobras, forearm balance (and balanced for a second) and a few urdhvas. It wasn't me. It was her connecting and aligning to her power, which was there all along. Or today in class a student shared that she thought she would never get married, ever, and then at a later age met the love of her life and now is happily married.

Yoga -as my teachers say- is "an invitation and not an obligation." Yoga invites us to embrace all that we think we are, and more. When we join the threads of our mind body, emotional body, physical body and spirit together, and connect to source, we end up expanding our limited perception of who we thought we were. Maybe as we begin our new year of 2012 we can practice opening up to more. 2012 is a interesting year. It is a year marked by Mayan calendar doomsday predictions of the world ending. Maybe on a metaphorical sense we can end the way we perceive ourselves and choose to see ourselves from a broader window.

This weekend I will be taking a three-day course on Craniosacral therapy. Will I become a Craniosacral Therapist? Who knows?! I am simply trying to follow my heart, stay sensitive to its signals and stay open to all that I am becoming.

May we stay open to possibilities.

May we not decide for ourselves how our day is going to go, how our practice is going to go, our year, our life is going to go. Whatever we are planning for ourselves is simply to small for all that life has waiting for us!

Theme: Open to possibilities.

Qualities: Honor and Open (ie, "Honor yourself, where you are at this moment, but stay open to possibilities.")

Focus: Inner Spiral

Pose: Hanumanasana

Cat/Cow

Down Dog/ Plank vinyasa

Lunge and twist

Uttanasana: with Shins in, thighs out

Half Sun Salutes,

Surya A

Uttanasana: with Inner Spiral adjustment

Surya B with crescent

Uttanasana: with Hamstring widening adjustment

Standing Splits

Handstands

Parsvakonasana

Trikonasana

Half Moon, Chapasana, Revolved Half Moon

Ardha Matsyendrasana

Eka Pada Koundyniasana #1

Baddha Konasana

Eka Pada Virasana

Hanumanasana

Eka Pada Koundyniasana #1

to Ganda Bherundasana

If time: twists using wall: Ardha Matsyendrasana and Krounchyasana twist

Hanumanasana again

Agni Stambasana

Upavista Konasana

Savasana

Today; a life

2012-02-01T17:06:23Z

I read a quote from the writer Annie Dillard which goes, "The way we spend our days is the way we spend our lives." It got me thinking about how I am choosing to live every day. It got me thinking about how often I spend so much of my days worrying about -literally- everything and running through negative scenarios in my mind. I am starting to become more aware of how each day can be a metaphor for my life! Can I make this day full? Can this day be filled with different textures, emotions, and details?

Yesterday, for instance, was quite full. I taught two classes. Both went really well and yet they weren't as full as usual. But I gave them my all and my best. Between classes, I had a mani/pedi, then went on a walk around the reservoir, which was so nice. After my second class, I met my friend and fellow teacher Allison for lunch. We talked about the challenges and gifts we were facing in our lives, without really complaining about our lives. Then I did some yoga, read, and later met my boyfriend for dinner and a movie. If yesterday was my entire life, then it was a good life!

That said, I would like to continue to work on the excess worrying. I think that our profession of teaching yoga is fraught with the challenges of truly not knowing how a class is going to go, who is coming to class each time, and not getting caught up in numbers. I know it is such a competitive world and market. One of the challenges lies in staying true to yourself and recognizing that you are perfect as you are, and not trying to be like another teacher! Recognizing that the universe is good and that the way things are happening are exactly as they are supposed to!

May I trust in the goodness of the universe.

May I trust that how my day goes is exactly as it is meant to- and still work really hard, do my best and give the highest of myself to whoever is there.

May I spend today living with gratitude, as if today was my entire life.

We have so much to be thankful for!

Anusara Teacher Training, second weekend

2012-01-30T17:26:07Z

Massive love for the Anusara Teacher Training that Keric and I are teaching at Siesta Yoga! Those 14 students are so cool, so kind and present. They are completely open to everything we throw them. Yesterday I was with them from 1-6:30. I taught a practice and here is the sequence:

Theme: "Trust in the Universe"

Heart Qualities: Strength and Openness

UPA focus: Muscular Energy

Peak Pose: Shoulder Stand

Cit/Ananda: The teachings of yoga remind us that the Universe is essentially good. So may we trust that everything will turn out all right.

Sequence:

Balasana, Down Dog, Uttananasana

Half Sun Salutes

Sun Salutes with Locusts (to start to get the arms in the back plane, prep for Shoulder Stand)

Very slow, methodical instructions teaching how to find Muscular Energy in the poses.

Pinca Mayurasana (twice, with different spots helping us feel our strength)

Prasarita Padottanasana

Parsvakonasana

Virabhadrasana 2, Trikonasana

Standing with Gomukhasana arms, then bowing down

Purvottanasana to Agnistambasana

Parsvottanasana to Parivrrta Trikonasana

Bridge with strap over feet so that we can pull in and draw into our strength, and thus open the heart more.

Shoulder Stand with a friend spotting our legs, helping the shoulder blades set more firmly on the backs.

Marichyasana 1

Ardha Eka Pada Gomuha Pascimottanasana

Pascimottanasana

Savasana

The practice went well! Then we deconstructed the class and we talked about how I created it and heard what they thought what the theme was, the qualities were, etc. Then we did a journaling exercise about how their yoga practice had helped them through a challenge. This is by far the most powerful part of class, and they shared it with a partner. Some shared with the whole class! As they were sharing they could feel how the sharing might one day be an opening for a class, for sure. It was so moving to hear how our yoga practice sustains us and helps us through the challenges we face.

Then we had a break. Came back and did some teaching using Muscular Energy. Everyone taught one on one and two people (Jackie and Grace) taught the whole group and did FANTASTIC. Then we moved to another exercise of writing different benefits we get from Muscular Energy... A little more teaching...

Then we got to my favorite part which is anatomy and therapeutics. We talked about the Shoulder and explored the anatomy of it. We also looked at each other without alignment and I gave the students key things to look for in a student's shoulders. Then we verbally aligned each other. Lastly we talked about the 3 different kinds of meditation and ended with a 15 minute focused meditation using a mantra. Wonderful, wonderful, wonderful. I cannot wait to be back again.

Pina Bausch

2012-01-28T23:13:09Z

My student Kat mentioned a few weeks ago that I needed to see Wim Wender's 3D documentary on the choreographer Pina Bausch. Then when Ana asked me to see it with her last night, I jumped a the chance and we landed at the Arclight in Hollywood. Whenever I see dancers dance I always think, "Man, I will never be able to do that." However, watching these adult, gorgeous dancers I thought, "Man I can't do that but wouldn't it be fun to try?" I even felt that if I worked really hard and connected every movement deeply to my heart, I could!

After seeing the documentary I learned that Pina was famous for collaborating intensely with her dancers. The troupe created very powerful pieces, replete with eloquent gestures. In one piece, I was so moved by what the arms of a male dancer were saying about love. I literally could feel his joy and his heart opening! In another piece, I found it breathtaking the way a couple repeatedly would embrace, even though another dancer was tearing them apart. It got me musing about the power of attraction and relationships. And all of this was silent- yes there were a few words, but the power was in the gestures. These dancer were so filled with intention that it was as if they were singing soliloquies. I was reminded of one of the most beautiful quotes I've ever heard my teacher John Friend say, "Every limb is a conduit of your energy." So what are you saying with your poses?

The Sanskrit word mudra means "gesture" or "seal." We make mudras often in class (prayer pose is probably the most famous mudra). But if you think about it, every pose is a mudra. Every moment has us in a gesture. The asanas themselves are empty, like a cup, and we fill them up with the fluid of our intention. I hope tomorrow at the Training and next week in my class I get to inspire my students to move from the inside out. Like Pina, collaborate with them so that instead of class being a monologue, it becomes a conversation we are all having with this one playful energy that is dancing us every moment of our lives.

Ganda Bherundasana

2012-01-26T23:43:06Z

Last Friday during the Practice with John Friend at Encinitas, he had the certified teachers in the room demo three really challenging poses. One of them was "Formidable Face" pose AKA Ganda Bherundasana. For those who don't know, this is the pose where you are on your chin, your hands are beside your chest and your legs are above you, bent like a scorpion. When John told us to do it, I literally tried but couldn't. In all these years of yoga practice I have never been able to do it. It is one of those poses that is rarely taught in a regular yoga class, and when it is, it goes by in a flash and if you can't do it, you don't even try.

After the demo with John I went home and realized that I needed to practice this pose. So this week we have been doing it in my Practice classes at Still. This morning my 9AM class was- and I mean it- amazing. Truly amazing. My theme was "Kula." Sanskrit for "Community of the heart." People coming together not because they should, but because they want to. I have been thinking of how many wonderful friends I have in this community. Two of my dearest friends, Jenny and Michelle, had a birthday yesterday. Monica had one last week. Marc is having one soon. Tara J is in town and I adore her. I just went to Encinitas with Mackie. I am doing a TT with Keric and soon an Immersion with my beloved Hagar and Tara. All in all, I was thinking about how blessed we are to be part of this community with so many amazing people! In all honesty, the most important benefit I've ever gotten from yoga is the people I have met along the way, who have become like family.

So my theme today was Kula and in walks Felix -dear Hanuman Felix- with red envelopes filled with a dollar bill, gifts for everyone for the Chinese New Year. Plus, I had also brought fortune cookies for the class! So it was just one of those days where everything gels. Today at 9AM I had such a great group of people. The students were practicing with such care, awareness and fire! And at one moment I told them the story of the demo of Ganda Bherundasana. Lia Aprile, a beautiful, intelligent and radiant yoga teacher and writer, gave me a tip. She told me how she likes to get into the pose (from One-legged Down Dog) and I tried it right then and there and voila! I could do it! Lia and I hugged. Everyone clapped. I might have shed a few tears. Several students were able to get into that pose in class and later during the Practice. It was amazing. It got me thinking how often I decide for myself that I cannot do something; and I am okay with it. And then one day, something shifts and there it is. Huge moral victory and inspiration whenever we do something we didn't think we could do! It makes us wonder what else is possible?

May we stay open to possibilities on this New Year.

May we keep listening and learning from each other.

Thank you Lia!

Thank you John for the elegant Universal Principles of Alignment.

Thank you beautiful community.

And Thank you Ganda Bherundasana, for your patience with me all these years and for the revelation today!

Inhale presence, exhale sharing

2012-01-25T22:18:43Z

Been studying the Chinese poet Li-Young Lee for my writing class. My writing teacher Jack Grapes often will give his long-standing students a writer to work on. The idea is to immerse yourself in a writer and then write a journal entry, with your own voice, but inspired by whatever author you are working on. Throughout the years I have worked on: Mary Oliver, Claribel Alegria, Sharon Olds, Rainer Maria Rilke, Charles Bukowski, Anna Akhmatova and others. It is one of my most favorite homework ever. I get to learn about a writer and watch how my own writing is transformed by them.

So I have been reading Li-Young and came upon a beautiful excerpt of him discussing the breath. I wanted to share it with you, dear readers!

"I've been thinking about something for a long time, and I keep noticing that most human speech- if not all human speech- is made with the outgoing breath. This is the strange thing about presence and absence. When we breath in, our bodies are filled with nutrients and nourishment. Our blood is filled with oxygen, our skin gets flush; our bones get harder- they get compacted. Our muscles get toned and we feel very present when we're breathing in. The problem is, that when we're breathing in, we can't speak. So presence and silence have something to do with each other.

The minute we start breathing out, we can talk; speech is made with the outgoing, exhaled breath. The problem that this poses, though, is that as we exhale, nutrients are leaving our bodies; our bones get softer, our muscles get flaccid, our skin starts to loosen. You could think of that as the dying breath. So as we breathe out, we have less and less presence."

Li-Young Lee interviewed by Tina Chang

What an exquisite way to interpret and see the breath! The breath as an ongoing paradoxical dance between presence and absence; between silence and communication; between being Self-Aware and Self-Expression.

May we have both today.

May we be aware of our true Self and of our own unique expression.

May we honor other's presence as well as their sharing.

Off to writing class and then to celebrate my best friend's birthday.

Have a wonderful day of inhaling and exhaling.

Black Dog Teacher Training, January 2012

2012-01-23T22:52:47Z

Yesterday I taught for a few hours at Black Dog's Teacher Training. It was my first time alone with the students and I found them engaged and lovely. I was instructing them on the Shoulder, which is one of my most favorite subjects. I used to call it the "Shoulder Joint" but now I am trying to call it the "Shoulder Complex." The Shoulder Complex is actually made up of 3 joints. The primary joint is the "glenohumeral joint" which is where the humerus connects to the glenoid fossa, a part of the scapula that creates the socket. There are also two secondary joints: the acrimioclavicular joint, which is where the clavicle joins with the acromion process (another part of the scapula). And the sternoclavicular joint, which is where the clavicle connects to the sternum. This last joint- interestingly enough- is the only place where the shoulder connects to the spine (via sternum to ribs, to thoracic spine). The Shoulder Complex is incredibly complex! It is one of the most movable parts of the body, prone to dislocation and injury. It is made up of the clavicle, humerus and scapula, plus myriad of muscles, tendons and ligaments.

The students seemed fascinated by it. We did some observation of each other's shoulders as well as some alignment. Then we did a little practice of Surya A focusing on the shoulders. And some troubleshooting on challenging poses like chaturanga dandasana and cobra.

This coming Sunday, I'll be teaching my other concurrent Teacher Training, the 60-hour Anusara Teacher Training that I am co-teaching with Keric at Siesta Yoga. I will continue discussing the Shoulder Complex, as well as bringing in some therapeutic yoga, which several of the students in the training asked me about. I never get tired of sharing and learning about the body, about yoga, about life.

May we take care of our shoulders and strengthen them, as a way of bringing more freedom of expression to our lives!

Reflections on Encinitas practice with John

2012-01-21T20:10:06Z

Oh, I'm sore! After practicing for four hours on Thursday, I was surprisingly enough not sore the next day. I think sleeping for 10 hours really helped. But Friday after the practice, we got in the car and drove for over 3 hours, and that brought in the soreness! Still, it speaks to the brilliance of the principles of alignment that we can practice so many different and difficult poses and not get hurt or feel diminished. It really is a testament to the power of great alignment in yoga. And boy did we do so much yoga! Yesterday's session in Encinitas, John was on fire! John was so happy and radiant, plus we were aided by the gifted Todd Boston who accompanied us for four hours with his guitar. We did the same sequence as the previous two days but there were slight differences. For instance, there was way more backbending on Friday. And for the third day in a row Shoulder Stand was forgotten! Poor Shoulder Stand.

I always learn so much from John. Ever since I started to study with him back in 2003, he is the most generous teacher in terms of sharing. He is always like a little boy, filled with excitement and enthusiasm over yoga. Always in a good mood when he teaches, always smiling and kind. Every demo he has someone do, he completely honors the student. I was so impressed with how focused he was during the teaching of over 100 poses and how he would give modifications to literally each one of the poses. We were all practicing a challenging class while still honoring our limits.

There were very few demos but they were so inspiring. Scott L did a crazy backbending sequence: Ustrasana, to Eka Hasta Ustrasana, to drop back from Ustrasana to Kapotasana. My friend Uma did a beautiful Headstand drop-over into Eka Pada Viparita Dandasana 2 back into Chakrasana. It is so inspiring to see what the body is capable of! At one moment John asked the certified teachers in the room to gather at the center. I think there were about 14 of us. I kept breathing into my heart as I had a feeling that we were going to be asked to do something CRAZY. And boy I was right. We all gathered at the center: Hagar, Tony, Michael, Scott, Stacy, and others. There were two photographers taking pictures, just to add to the slight pressure. The demo occurred during the armbalancing part of the practice, and as fate would have it he asked us to do, literally, the hardest armbalance in my humble opinion: Visvamitrasana. Oy. I took a breath, literally started praying to my late grandfather Aio who was in my thoughts. I ended up doing the best Visvamitrasana I've ever done. Then I thought, "Good, I made it through this demo." But no, John asked us for more and then he said, "Eka Pada Koundinyasana #2 (fine!) into (oh God) Ganda Bherundasana (Nooo). I literally cannot do that pose. The horror. I tried to kick up but couldn't. This is the pose where you are on your chin, your hands beside your chest and you kick up like a scorpion, balancing. I turned to see my sister Hagar doing it beautifully (what a radiant light she is). I saw other teachers couldn't do it as well and I felt slightly better. Ego anyone? I left the demo feeling a little sad but also realizing that I need to practice this pose. In fact this coming Tuesday at the Practice we are going to be working on that pose and I asked Hagar to come and helps us get there! So there is always something new to be working on and challenging poses help expand our idea of who we think we are and what we are capable of. I look forward to trying something so difficult in a safe and supportive environment.

The practice ended and afterwards John had us all gather around. He then spoke about going to Israel in March and how he wants to share yoga with the world. He then had the Israeli teachers come up (Hagar!) and then in front of everyone certified a woman from Israel. I forget her name but I will never forget how moving it was to see her be celebrated like this; her husband and daughter were there supporting and applauding her. It was awesome.

Mackie and I drove back home and hit pretty strong traffic. I had to literally rush home, shower, then get back in the car, and drive to Black Dog for our first day of Teacher Training. We have 8 very sweet and grounded individuals. One of them is my friend Suzanne who I adore and my student Rachel who is so giving in her gratitude. We had our introductions and all of the teachers gave a little bit of teachings about yoga, about Patanajali, about what yoga is and what it isn't. I closed the evening with a very gentle and relaxing restorative practice.

This Sunday I will be teaching again at the training. I am now part of two different trainings going on simultaneously! And come March, Hagar's, Tara's and my Immersion will begin. But by then thing would have calmed down considerably. It is incredibly exciting and thrilling to see how yoga has become my life and how it informs and sustains it. I hope that I can continue to be the best teacher for my students, continue to be present and be of service.

I am going to go now to (surprise) a yoga workshop with an Iyengar teacher. Will write about it when I return.

Blessing to all my teachers, in particular John for his constant, generous sharing.

May we keep learning, assimilating and sharing our light!

John Friend's practices at Encinitas

2012-01-20T15:37:23Z

John Friend is teaching three-day Practices, entitled "Ignite the Center" at Encinitas. The four hour classes (yes, you read that right) are a intelligently sequenced asana practices. The same sequence is given on all three days, Wednesday, Thursday and Friday. I got here yesterday with my dear friend and fellow adventurer Mackie. We are having the sessions at Seaside Center for Spiritual Living, and there must be over 250 people.

Today is the last day and we will head back soon, to experience the same sequence again which includes (in this order):

Standing poses and Vinyasa

Hip openers and Hand balancings

Thigh stretches and Backbends

Forward bends and twists

Meditation and Savasana

Between each section there is a small meditation practice. We were asked before we got here, by the Anusara office via an email, to refrain from talking or using the bathroom during the practice. To treat the studio as if it was a mandir or temple. To embody a quality of introspection and devotion is how I took it- to hold the center so that we can practice with such focus and intensity. I does help to walk in to a room filled with yogis and not feel that out-of-control vata energy that very often is the case in these workshops. People seemed very grounded, centered and happy to be here. John is suntanned, seems calm and centered as well. It always is so nice to seem him and afterwards I got to spend a few moments with him and tell him how I was doing. In fact, after the practices, John invited all us to look at the Anusara Center that will open up in Encinitas in March. A bunch of us went to the location, right next to the Self-Realization Fellowship and right next to the ocean. It must be about 2,000 square feet of bright, warehouse-like space, with brick walls, windows and skylights. John has so many ideas and visions for the center and he really wants to make it a place where we share our yoga with the world. Then we all walked over towards Swami's beach to watch some whales (wow!) and the sunset.

As far as the practices themselves I thought it was interesting that we were all given the syllabi of poses we were going to do for four hours. Since you had the paper in your hand you knew what was to come, and it is quite intimidating to see all that is coming. My thoughts jumped a little bit into fear and worry that I wouldn't be able to do all that was asked. But as it usually happens, if you go one step at a time, one pose at a time, you end up doing it all. Also it helps that John is a master teacher of asana and he has a masterful way of getting you into the poses and keeping you there by connecting to your heart, to your mind and your sprit. I always learn so much from him.

I am not sore this morning. I actually feel really good today (it helped that Mackie and I slept for 10 hours last night!). We are off to get some Acai bowls for breakfast and go to the practices for one more day!

Have a wonderful day everyone.

Chronos and Kairos

2012-01-18T17:28:31Z

I have been thinking about the Greek gods Chronos and Kairos lately. Chronos is the god of time; it's where we get the terms "chronology," "chronological," or "chronometer." It's the way we live our lives. We book our days on time blocks, knowing through that structure exactly what we are going to do each day, when we are going to do it, and how long it will last. For instance, I have to go by 10AM, leave my house, drive towards Black Dog, to teach a class that lasts an hour-and-a-half. Then I have a therapist session from 1-2PM. Then my writing class from 4 to 6PM. Then I'll take an introduction to craneosacral therapy from 7-9PM. Tomorrow morning I leave my house at 7AM to make it to Encinitas so that I can take John Friend's practice which goes from 10 to 2PM. And so our lives go, blocked in time sequences. We need this structure for our householder's lives to survive and thrive.

However, there is another energy. Kairos is the God of sacred time; of good timing, synchronicity, serendipity. It is seizing the moment and a making it the "right moment." It is being in the flow. Have you ever been at a certain place, at a certain time and just said the right thing? It is so wonderful when it happens! As Anusara yogis we recognize that Grace is always present. Therefore the possibilities for each moment being ripe with sacredness are always there. May we step into the moment more fully, so that each time, each day, each block of our structured life, we can join our chronos with our kairos and live our lives with all our responsibilities and yet with a magical dash of serendipitous awareness.

Have a wonderful structured yet magical day everyone!

Anusara Teacher Training, first weekend

2012-01-16T17:27:11Z

We had our first weekend of Keric's and my 60-hour Anusara Teacher Training at Siesta Yoga. It was such a success. This is my fifth Teacher Training in my life, but my first ever Anusara Teacher Training. I was quite nervous leading up to it, and yet on the day of, I felt such a resounding calm. The great thing about teaching Anusara yoga is that I get to practice all the uplifting and life-affirming philosophy that I am teaching. I kept relaxing my body, breathing with awareness, to the point where I just knew that the training would be fabulous.

And so far it has been! Keric and I work really well together. I trust him completely and feel so at ease with him. We planned every week for many months and designed a really strong structure for our students. And, oh, the students. They are the sweetest most supportive group. Almost everyone knows each other. Some have been teaching for a while but most are new to teaching. The group is big enough to break into different groups and to feel like a nice-sized class, and yet small enough that it feels nurturing and safe (there's 14 people).

Keric and I start the training with an hour-and-a-half practice. We wanted to model to the students what they will be teaching one day. We are trying our best to keep our opening to 5-7 minute, just like we are supposed to in an Anusara class. We are trying to have a clear theme that links to the highest purposes of practicing yoga, a personal story and a heart quality (or qualities). We also choose a UPA to focus on and have a peak pose. Then we have a practice.

Afterwards we deconstruct the class and the students get to see if the theme was clear and most importantly, how we constructed the class. Hopefully the students start to see how it is done and how doable it can be. Keric and I really want to demystify teaching, while also honoring who challenging and artistic it is.

Then we have the students journal about the particular UPA we are focusing one, share that with someone so that their articulation skills can be honed. Then we have them teach a pose using those words that came from their own experience. We then give them a break. When we come back we do more teaching exercises. As the training progresses we will bring (we did already actually) philosophy, some therapeutics, adjustment and always end in meditation.

We will continue to hone the training to keep serving our student's needs. I was so blown away though by the fact that one the very first weekend, every single person taught a full Surya Namaskar A to someone else (and some taught to the whole group!). We wanted to get the students up and teaching already so that they wouldn't feel overwhelmed by teaching. And I believe that it is when you know how to get a student safely and effectively in and out of poses, that you then can bring in all the artistry of theming that Anusara is so famous for.

What an amazing gift it is to be part of this training. I can't wait to be back and to watch the students and Keric and I continue to grow as individuals and as a community.

Off to teach- have a great day everyone!

Teacher Training starts tomorrow!

2012-01-13T17:18:35Z

I have been preparing intensely for Keric's and my 60-hour Anusara Teacher Training which starts tomorrow at Siesta Yoga. I can drive myself a little crazy with the over-preparing but it still is one of my most favorite parts: spending hours every day studying; going to bed with tons of yoga books until I fall asleep; reviewing old notebooks; journaling about the Universal Principles of Alignment... And then at some moment, letting it all go and trusting that the knowledge and wisdom is there. Showing up and being humble and open and letting the moment happen!

Tomorrow begins our 6-weekend training. And then next weekend Black Dog Yoga begins their 200-hour Teacher Training, which I am honored to be a part of for the fifth time in a row. And then a month from now, Hagar and I begin our 108-hour Anusara Immersion, with guest teacher Tara Judelle. So I will be literally part of three different trainings during the next few months. I am so excited and curious to see how it will go. It is scheduled in a such a way that it is doable (for instance one training will end as another begins). But still, it will be a lot, and I already feel myself worrying a bit.

I was re-reading our Anusara Yoga Teacher Training Manual and came upon one of my most favorite lines, "By surrendering you actually become vastly more powerful than the limited person that you usually identify with." I italicized the part that always gets to me. How we tend to identify with our limited aspects instead of with our vastness. How we tend to believe that who we are is our worry, our fear, our negativity. As I am getting ready to teach an incredibly talented group of yogis, I also get to practice yoga through the teaching of it. I get to remember that who we really are is a vast, powerful energy bigger than our ups and downs. That whenever I start to doubt or become fearful, I simply need to back off from this "pose" and realign again; reawaken to my own nature, which is ever-expansive and bigger than my worry.

The great inventor and genius Thomas Edison supposedly had a group of men called the "Insomnia Squad" who were there with him, working around the clock, so that no idea would be lost. Someone would always be awake should there happen to be a breakthrough in their research at their lab. I think that for us as yogis we need our own inner squad; maybe call it the "Inspiration Squad." There has to be a part of us ready to reawakens us to who we are, reminding us over and over of our true nature, never letting us go to sleep -metaphorically speaking- and miss our own vastness and power.

Have a great day everyone!

In a nutshell

2012-01-09T17:21:20Z

This coming weekend marks the beginning of Keric's and my Teacher Training. It will be a 60 hour, 6 weekend Level One, Anusara Teacher Training. I can't wait! It will be held at our friend's Siesta Yoga on Hollywood and Franklin. We are blessed to have almost every single one of our Immersion students from last year, plus a few more wonderful individuals. Keric and I want to create a supportive and fun environment where the teachers learn how to teach effectively mixed level classes, while developing personal and universal themes.

One of the hardest feats for Anusara teachers is to weave a theme from beginning to end of class, that ties to the highest reasons for practicing yoga; namely Cit (Consciousness) and Ananada (Bliss). If the theme is too heavy or not fully integrated, it can feel as if we are hitting the students over the head with it. If it's too light or not really there, classes can feel like a workout. To weave the theme with the right amount of presence and yet masterfully create a fun and physical practice, is quite an accomplishment.

One of the most helpful suggestions is to tie in whatever I am saying (the personal), to the big picture (the universal). As soon as I do that, I am plugged into the highest teachings of yoga. I feel that I can walk into any room, even if nervous, and know that I will be supported. Keric and I will be giving the students suggestions on how to do this. Hopefully as we continue to teach today and the rest of our days, we will feel supported by the highest.

It reminds me of something I recently read, which ties back to the writings of the Roman orator Cicero. Cicero contended that in the olden days, scribes would write down by hand Homer's Iliad into a walnut shell. Thus, soldiers could walk into battle holding the entire poem (all 17,000 verses) inside their pockets. And they had it there handy for inspiration. Supposedly Alexander the Great carried it when he marched into India. This is where- interestingly enough- the phrase, "in a nutshell" emerges from. The idea being that large amount of information can be reduced to its essence in just a few words, and captured inside a nutshell.

Anusara teachers are like these soldiers, marching unto unfamiliar grounds (new classes, with new students), carrying within them verses of knowledge reminding us of our non-dual Tantrik philosophy of intrinsic goodness. We might come to class and have a theme of one word, say "Fullness." But within we are holding years and years of studying, reading, researching, meditating, contemplation, and yoga that supports all that we say in class, all that we do. And all of it living inside the nutshell of our hearts.

Fun Practice

2012-01-05T23:51:53Z

Today I taught twice at Still, and then in a few hours will return to teach the restorative. Class at 9 was lovely- really lovely people with beautiful practices. I was teaching about aligning so that you can have faith in your practice and connect to the fullness within. I spoke about how in the last few days I've had several students say to me that they have "been doing yoga for so long and yet their shoulders hurt." And when I had them show me how they were aligning, they were not doing it in the most optimal way. I told them with gentleness that you can be doing something for a long period of time, but if you are misaligning you will not get better. It reminds me of Malcom Gladwell's assertion in his book "Outliers" which states that professionals are people who have been doing something for a long period of time (10,000 hours). But what he left out (from -I believe- Erikson's study) is that you have to be doing something for a long period of time, yes, but you have to be doing it right! Otherwise you are simply reinforcing bad habits. These two students were completely misaligning in their shoulders, and practicing yoga like that for years will indeed make your shoulders tighter.

It got me thinking about how yoga shouldn't hurt. How as we do all these poses, we should feel uplifted, not diminished. So, today I focused on the First Principle of Anusara yoga, which has to do with opening up with the fullness that is there and embodying it. I focused on an aspect of First Principle which is "Side Body Long." I could see the student's practice become fuller, sweeter and stronger.

Then after my 9 AM class, I met with Keric for our weekly meetings for our upcoming Anusara Teacher Training, which starts next week! So excited. I have been holding back cause I don't want to say too much before it begins, but we are so excited on how we have designed it and on how we are teaching it... More on that later!

Then I went to teach the Practice at 12:30 and it was insane. The cast of characters included several of my closest friends (Jenny, Mackie, Hagar, Michelle), beloved regulars (Takeo, Raoul, Christine, Carolyn, Carolanne, Amberly), plus guest stars like Heidi (Happy Birthday Heidi!) and superstar Jason from Miami. Hagar and I brought out favorite deities (Durga and Kali) and we had a fun, rocking practice which included several variations in Vasisthasana (including -inside joke- "sad tree.")

One of my favorite moments was when we were working on Kasyapasana and Hagar and Jason offered tips to get into the bind. We all worked on it and then came out and conversed about what we liked. That is my favorite part of this class- all of us practicing together, sharing what helps us go deeper in these wonderful and challenging poses.

After class, Mackie took a picture of Hagar and I for our upcoming Immersion. The pictures look great! I drove home and in a few hours I will return to teach a restorative class.

So blessed to have such fun friends and to have yoga in my life!

Have a great day everyone!

A magical private

2012-01-05T05:11:26Z

I had a new private tonight. It was a young woman who had an aneurysm back in October. Her husband called me a few weeks ago, and told me that my name was given by a mutual friend. I asked my private client what her intention for doing yoga was and she said she is wanting to regain her strength and to heal. I was so taken with her openness, vulnerability and resilience. She showed me the scars on her skull, and we talked for a long while. Then we did some gentle movement with breath, some therapeutics and some stretches. We ended with a restorative pose.

She cried several times during the session and told me that she felt great afterwards. She told me that she believes part of the lessons of this experience is to learn how to slow down. Her speech is halting and as she would speak slowly, I found myself at times wanting to finish her sentences or help her find words, but I didn't. I remembered watching Ram Dass' documentary "Fierce Grace." At one point he tells his speech therapist how frustrating it was for him to have others want to finish his statements after his stroke. So I listened and let her speak with her slow, breathy rhythm. They said they wanted me to come back and I hope it happens. I look forward to being with her energy again and to help her heal.

Also, I am reading this obscure book on Craniosacral therapy, that I have never seen in anyone's house before or any yoga studio. I been walking around with this book and had it in my car. When I walked in to their house they had the book right there at the entrance. I was blown away- specifically because I have been so drawn to studying carniosacral therapy. I told them I had the book in the car and they were quite impressed to. It might seem like we were making much out of nothing but it felt magical.

At the end of the session, when she was in savasana, I gently held her skull, careful not to press the tube on the right side of her skull. I held her head with the utmost sensitivity. I could feel the throbbing of her pulse and continued to soften my grip. Then at one moment I literally felt her head wanting to turn to the left (which is her tendency) and I mentally communicated for her to not turn and to stay aligned. Afterwards, she told me that she felt her body wanting to misalign and revert to old patterns but she didn't let it. It was so interesting that we both felt the same thing.

There is so much to the body! So many mysteries!

I hope to live long enough to continue to learn and help heal others and myself.

Back Home

2012-01-01T21:57:09Z

I got back home today from my fasting experience at We Care. Today- the third day of my stay- I started to feel really happy, which is one of the symptoms people experience during fasting. It was a nice welcome relief as the first two days I had headaches and was fantasizing about Ceasar salads with shrimp, and warm rice with avocados. I don't think I am the ideal candidate for a juicing and colonic spa. This might be the first and last time I do this. Last night, they did strawberry smoothies to celebrate New Year's and we all got one little cup. I kept licking the cup, turning it upside down, and trying to barter my way to another cup, to no avail.

The people who were there, as well as the therapists and workers were all lovely. Really. The place itself was so beautiful and my favorite part was lying down by the pool, feeling the desert sun, reading. I finished Jack Kornfield's "Bringing Home the Dharma," and Tina Fey's "Bossypants." I am still reading my fourth Joseph Campbell book and I started two books, one on Craneosacral Therapy and the other Melville's "Moby Dick." Often I would go to a secluded chair and look at the mountains and feel the sun. There were little bunnies with cotton-tails and I felt joyous taking it all in.

That said, I don't think I was the best candidate for this particular spa. We Care is known for their juice-fasting program, as well as for their colonics. I did well on one of those two things and the other I refused to do. I leave it to you to figure out which one freaked me out. And because I refused to get said treatment, several guests would look at me like I was a leper. "Then why are you here?" Several people asked me. "To fast and experience some quiet," I would say and smile.

I was often asked about my vices and I found myself saying, "Coffee and reality shows." I don't really think I am a vice-filled person! I overheard several guests talking about their vices (the topic du jour) and how they feel so toxic. I am in no way the picture of perfect health but I do think I live a pretty healthy life: I do yoga, meditate, go to therapy and try to eat mostly organic and healthy. I do eat animal products but I just don't see myself or my body as this wasteful, cesspool, toxic-filled container! The way some of these people were talking about themselves and their eating habits, you would think they were licking trash cans every night.

That said, some people do lead very unhealthy lives and they do need something like We Care to restart and reboot. One of my fellow fasters was a young woman who confessed one night (and it did feel like a confession) that she ate "Jack in the Box" every night as well as drank a bottle of wine. To her I say, "Juice it up, Sister!" I also befriended these two gentlemen who admitted to me how much they loved to eat and we bonded over that. One of them asked me to write down the list of the best restaurants in LA. I was glad to do it, especially since my father has been taking us to amazing restaurants all of last week. I wrote "Providence" on Melrose as the #1 restaurant. He said he and his wife would invite me when they were in LA.

The other gentleman would often approach me in secret and talk to me about Dunkin' Doughnuts, Starbucks and pastrami sandwiches. It was all very secretive and I loved every moment of it. Another time a lady was reading a Conde Nast Traveler magazine that had an article on Italian food and she ripped the article away. I asked her if I could read it. I looked at the pictures of the italian pizzas like young boys look at Playboy centerfolds. You know, the more you deny yourself of something, the more attached you become to it!

Driving home I had a little taste of the salad they give you at the end of your stay. As soon as I brought the first solid food to my mouth (a cucumber) eating became a sacred experience. My mouth reveled in all the flavors and textures of the cucumber, I couldn't get enough. Then I followed that with one single leaf of lettuce and it was delicious. I proceeded to indulge like that- leaf after leaf. Each piece of food was enough by itself and made me joyous and grateful. How often I scarf down food like a hyena, not really tasting anything. If there is something I learned from my stay on this retreat, was to savor and enjoy my food. I hope that this learning lasts!

I got home, unpacked and went to M Cafe, a macrobiotic restaurant. I had a salad and for the first time ever, I was full half-way through it. I've been thinking a lot about "fullness" and "emptiness" and how often I eat to fill a void that cannot be filled by food. I once had a therapist who would ask her patients who had food issues, "If you were not hungry right now, what would you be feeling?" Meaning that very often when we think we are hungry we are often trying to bypass other emotions.

I just got back from Whole Foods, where I brought a bevy of delicious and healthy foods. I did what they suggested which was to prepare the food beforehand- usually when we are in a hurry we just eat what is available. But when we take the time to prep and store food, label it, etc, then when we are hungry the food is ready and healthy.

I am grateful that I got to spend my New Year's at this spa. I feel like I learned a lot. Today I am eating with a sense of reverence that was not there before. May we all feel grateful right before we eat, as we are eating, and after!

My parents are still here and they leave tomorrow. We are all planning to go to see "Mission Impossible 4." I already saw it and can't wait to see it again. It rocks!!!

Happy New Year everyone.