Friday night we explored the Anusara Level 1 Syllabus. Today is Level 2 poses and tomorrow Level 3. Today Saturday is sold out.  I went yesterday and will go tomorrow, Sunday.

Okay, so I was very happy about this since I love to explore basic poses and go deep in familiar poses. What I didn't realize is that in 3 hours these gifted and masterful teachers were going to take us, literally, through the entire Level 1 syllabus. Which has by the way 108 poses. And with the exception of  a few poses here and there (cat/cow, eight point prone pose, ardha padmasana...) they did it, they took us through the whole damn thing. 

Therefore class was very focused, fast and intense. I was sweating and felt challenged. It was joy to do all these familiar poses and really go into them. My main observation was that it felt hurried at times, because, let's face it, it was.

For instance, when it was time to do the arm balances we did Vasisthasana on the right side, then second side. Without stopping we went back to first side and did the modified version and then added tree leg back to second side back. Without stopping we went back to first side and added the leg up, then go second side. Whoa! That was a lot. AND it was fun and challenging. But all I kept thinking was- man, this is level 1. How in the hell, how in the HELL am I going to do Level 3 poses, all of them, on Sunday? I can't do almost all the poses on Level 3? And I CAN do all the poses in Level 1 and I am struggling. How will I do this?

And this is, dear readers, where the hardest pose of all came in: my mind.

This is where I started to go down the rabbit hole of  my mind. 

Behold a glimpse of what happened to me last night as I doing the practice, 

(Curse words have been edited as well as all Spanish words have been translated):

And that was just a glimpse of what happens in my mind. Which is my most challenging asana.

I realize that I have a great part of me that believes I cannot do many things. And here comes the funny part- I'm okay with it!  

But at what point does being okay with it starts to make me too comfortable in my own life?

This is that fine line of when it is time to challenge yourself and break through age old patterns? 

And when is it time to say it's okay, this is not for me right now?

I will let you know what transpires on Sunday.

Pray for me.