Puerto Rico
I had no internet service and I was so missing writing my blog. I was back home in San Juan, visiting the folks for Thanksgiving. Yep we celebrate Thanksgiving in Puerto Rico. We celebrate every American holiday, Spanish holidays and our own Puerto Rican holidays! We truly are such a festive culture. In fact I was telling someone (and they didn't believe me) that PR is the only country I've been in where people clap as the plane arrives in the island. Every single time. And I was clapping too.
Going back home is such a trip. I just turned 37 and I feel when I go back that I regress in time somehow. My room in my parents house is still the same, with the same collages that I made from magazine cuttings on the doors and the walls; VHS of STAR WARS and INDIANA JONES; tons of books on the shelves from childhood, adolescence and now. I go back home and I go back in time.
But on this trip, as short as it was, several commented on how calm I seemed (the word in Spanish is tranquila) and I felt myself being calmer in the moments where usually there are triggers from me with my parents and my family. I really can feel the benefits of the yoga and meditation. Not reacting when people say things that normally would have upset me. Trying to embody calm.
John Friend talks all the time about creating the poses from the inside out:
"The poses in Anusara Yoga are considered to be 'heart oriented', and are expressed from 'inside out'. Instead of only trying to control the body and mind from the outside, the poses originate from a deep artistic feeling inside." (Anusara Yoga Teacher Training Manual)
How brilliant is John in reminding us that in every yoga class we try embody the poses from the inside. We try to become the theme of any given class. What starts to happen is that we start to embody what we study, what we believe, what we long for. There were moments when I would be listening to a beloved family member who would say something challenging to me and I could feel myself wanting to change them and dominate them into being more open minded (ha!- the irony). And instead I listened for the most part (sometimes I failed and lost my temper!) and tried to become that peace which I wished for them and for myself.
It's all a pose isn't it?
I arrived a few hours ago. I miss them, I miss home. And yet, I know that I am home wherever I am.
I can so relate... I found myself arguing at one time or another with my dad, my mom, my brother, I mean, all the people I miss so much and want to see so badly, I have the shortest fuse with... I also find myself giving unsolicited advice and triggering them as well... but all in all there's been much improvement in this sense and we each have in our own way learned to de-escalate and laugh and remember what is really important, how much life and love we've shared and how much we care about each other, which is the reason we even feel compelled to challenge each other in the first place... I hope you're feeling good to be home and I look forward to seeing you this weekend. mucho cariño... Monica
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